October Diary

I'm still reading the book "American Eden" and the chapter about early colonial gardens. While doing this series of little drawings, I was thinking about how the Europeans were carving out their outposts in the new world. Tulips and exotic tropical fruits were signs of status. They were considered "living booty" and the reason for "swash buckling botanist adventurers".


 I was also reminded of that scene in "The Great Gatsby" about the light at the end of Daisy's dock. Here's just a little of that lovely passage:
"And as the moon rose higher the inessential houses began to melt away until gradually I became aware of the old island that flowered once for Dutch sailors eyes- a fresh, green breast of the new world... face to face for the last time in history with something commensurate to his capacity for wonder."

Wallpaper?

Playing around with photoshop and multiplying images. My computer skills are not very good. But I've always liked pattern and repetition.

American Eden: Monticello

Today's post drawing, like last week's, is a "collage" of drawings added over time. I am increasingly interested in how people carve out their lands (whether thousands of acres or just a suburban plot) to create their vision of utopia. This drawing is inspired by Jefferson's Monticello as discussed in the great book "American Eden". I will just write words that inspired me in this drawing: Enlightenment, experiments in perfection, Palladian architecture...

Side by Side (this is the look I was after)

Welcome October

 

I'm back. I've learned a lot this summer. Mostly about how keeping my ambitions to a minimum and protecting my "thinking time" keeps me sane and happy. That said, I don't have a lot of time to sketch. My solution: making a collage of drawings on a two page spread. I only do a little drawing when I have the time and then add as the week (or so) goes on.

Thinking

What's reality and what's all made up? I guess what I mean by that maybe is what part of life is just a rat race? 

Yesterday, I tidied my bookshelves. I found all my journals over the last 20 years and put them together on one shelf. I just briefly read a few pages from several journals (my earliest being from High School- littered with a lot of "I am listening to Madonna (or Naked Eyes or whatever) right now...). Anyhow, I see a crazy pattern in myself- I am constantly trying to find the answers and to create a plan. I have probably a hundred "life" plans- all involving tabs, fonts, color coding, etc- that I abandon. I must accept this in myself it's my nature. And we are all a bit crazy aren't we? But there is some surrendering that I must do. I really don't want to do this in the next 20 years. 

Summer has been interesting. My three year old daughter and I have been together without interruption of preschool or much in the way of naps. I have let a lot slide. But what I am thinking about now is that- not much of what I let go of was very important. Just busy, things I think I should do or be. I think I will be very discerning in what I let back in. 

What about you? What feels more like rat race to you? What busy actions can you do without?

A bit of an Apology

I have been feeling funny about my last post. It's not that I don't believe what I wrote, but there was a smugness about it. 


So to amend my ways, I am taking the smug wind out of my sails and reading J. Krishnamurti. Here I am confronted with the absurdity of my every thought. But I'm still hoping to learn the meaning of life and to become a better human being.


Is that asking too much?