Three Year Old Perfection (to her mom and dad anyway)

Self Portrait (from L's photo portfolio)

So yesterday was the end of our evaluation experience. Punctuated by a committee hearing on L's eligibility for special needs help or disability services. Although the results of her evaluation are that she is in the normal range for her developmental progress, and we feel comfortable that what we see at home and on play dates is just fine and no red flags, her teachers are still certain there is something wrong. We believe their hearts are in the right place, but they are wrong. They are so certain that their school is "flawless" (my word not theirs) that they can't believe that it may not be a good fit for my daughter. Therefor the issue is our daughter and not the environment to them. 

So with their words ringing in our ears at the end of the conference committee: "we are certain you will be back to the office of special needs in a year and you will have missed valuable time", we are over analyzing every little quirky thing L does. Along those line, here is kind of a funny little story.

I was driving my daughter to school a couple of weeks ago and (somewhat inanely) engaging her in conversation using techniques that her evaluator had given me. Oh and  let me add that many mornings before this whole evaluation experience- I would have the radio on and we would have a relaxing, fairly quiet ride to school. Well after about 5 minutes of my prattling on, L says to me: "Turn the radio on please, Mommy" (she's nothing if not polite). And when I did, she visible relaxed in her car seat and looked out the window in relief. 

So much for all this expertise????

Too quick to detect?

       Sorry no post on Monday- I was busy fretting again. This is as creative as I have gotten in the last week (building castles with my 3 year old). So I was fretting about the same old thing. L had her second (and thankfully last) evaluation for learning developmental problems. As I have said in earlier posts these were recommended by her preschool teachers who told me she wasn't communicating in class. I received the results on Tuesday and thankfully everything is fine. I hesitate to talk about what has been on my mind because I am worried that it would be disrespectful to those who are raising children on the spectrum. But since I have been absorbed in this situation (and little else), I will risk sounding ignorant. 

        I think what happened with my daughter is that at school she was exhibiting behaviors that looked as though she might have been on the autistic spectrum. She wasn't communicating with her teachers or her peers. And when she was "working" on a little project, she wasn't responding to others around her. While I definitely appreciate the concern from her teachers and if there had been a developmental problem I do believe that early detection is key. But to my mind her behaviors were also in line with a reserved, quiet personality type. I wish that the teachers had given equal weight to the consideration that she wasn't autistic. They may have tried harder to engage her in conversation or asked me if she communicated at home. I don't mind the amount of time spent worrying that Matt and I did- that's our job as parents. But I do feel bad that L spent the first four months in preschool on the sidelines.

       If any one has any thoughts or comments, I would be really interested in other peoples experiences.