Christmas Cookies

Having a 4 year old in the kitchen is a bit like cooking with a monkey (at least our 4 year old). None the less, we are making memories along with our mess. Good time (and sugar high) was had by all.

My Laboratory of sorts

Here is a page from my "decorative arts" journal. It's not really what I'm after, but I think this is a process...


What am I after? I want to know more about movements and people who have set about with a vision for making domestic life aesthetic.  That might include William Morris, the Arts and Crafts movement, Frank Lloyd Wright... to name the tip of the ice berg. 


So how to present these objects, gardens and houses by capturing their essence without being too literal? That is my goal. My ultimate hope is that I develop something that others like to look at too. Then what?... one step at a time.


Thanks for tuning in. I hope the drawings and paintings will be a mix of personal and lovely.

Halloween

Here is the latest Laurel Journal entry- I seem to average about a month behind. I can live with that.
Look for a "Laurel makes Christmas Cookies" entry to come (should be in about a month).


In the mean time, I'm working on some ideas for a domestic design series. So stay tuned.

October Girl

Here we are post birthday and pre- Halloween. Lots of playing dress- up and pretend. All dressed up in pearls and a handbag, L comes to me and says: "I'm ready for my holiday!" (in an English accent no less). I'm not sure where these things come from, but its all amazing fun.

October Diary

I'm still reading the book "American Eden" and the chapter about early colonial gardens. While doing this series of little drawings, I was thinking about how the Europeans were carving out their outposts in the new world. Tulips and exotic tropical fruits were signs of status. They were considered "living booty" and the reason for "swash buckling botanist adventurers".


 I was also reminded of that scene in "The Great Gatsby" about the light at the end of Daisy's dock. Here's just a little of that lovely passage:
"And as the moon rose higher the inessential houses began to melt away until gradually I became aware of the old island that flowered once for Dutch sailors eyes- a fresh, green breast of the new world... face to face for the last time in history with something commensurate to his capacity for wonder."

Wallpaper?

Playing around with photoshop and multiplying images. My computer skills are not very good. But I've always liked pattern and repetition.

American Eden: Monticello

Today's post drawing, like last week's, is a "collage" of drawings added over time. I am increasingly interested in how people carve out their lands (whether thousands of acres or just a suburban plot) to create their vision of utopia. This drawing is inspired by Jefferson's Monticello as discussed in the great book "American Eden". I will just write words that inspired me in this drawing: Enlightenment, experiments in perfection, Palladian architecture...

Side by Side (this is the look I was after)

Welcome October

 

I'm back. I've learned a lot this summer. Mostly about how keeping my ambitions to a minimum and protecting my "thinking time" keeps me sane and happy. That said, I don't have a lot of time to sketch. My solution: making a collage of drawings on a two page spread. I only do a little drawing when I have the time and then add as the week (or so) goes on.

Thinking

What's reality and what's all made up? I guess what I mean by that maybe is what part of life is just a rat race? 

Yesterday, I tidied my bookshelves. I found all my journals over the last 20 years and put them together on one shelf. I just briefly read a few pages from several journals (my earliest being from High School- littered with a lot of "I am listening to Madonna (or Naked Eyes or whatever) right now...). Anyhow, I see a crazy pattern in myself- I am constantly trying to find the answers and to create a plan. I have probably a hundred "life" plans- all involving tabs, fonts, color coding, etc- that I abandon. I must accept this in myself it's my nature. And we are all a bit crazy aren't we? But there is some surrendering that I must do. I really don't want to do this in the next 20 years. 

Summer has been interesting. My three year old daughter and I have been together without interruption of preschool or much in the way of naps. I have let a lot slide. But what I am thinking about now is that- not much of what I let go of was very important. Just busy, things I think I should do or be. I think I will be very discerning in what I let back in. 

What about you? What feels more like rat race to you? What busy actions can you do without?

A bit of an Apology

I have been feeling funny about my last post. It's not that I don't believe what I wrote, but there was a smugness about it. 


So to amend my ways, I am taking the smug wind out of my sails and reading J. Krishnamurti. Here I am confronted with the absurdity of my every thought. But I'm still hoping to learn the meaning of life and to become a better human being.


Is that asking too much?

Home is Where the Heart is

I'm still here. As many of you mothers know- summer changes everything. Time for personal projects is minimal- but I have still been reading and pondering. Today my thoughts are going back to a quote I read from the book that I wrote about a month ago (Robert Shaw's The Epidemic). Here is the quote:
"We've lost our sense of what matters most in our children's lives- and when we do know, we are not spending the time or energy to make it happen. Then there's the great conspiracy of silence. It's not politically correct to say some of our lifestyle choices are not in the best interest of our children..."


What do you think?


Up until reading that quote, I took the line of trying to be non judgmental about parents who opted for day care and both parents working full time. I took seriously the gospel out there that women shouldn't turn on other women and belittle their choices. But the kids of these parents will be the friends of my kid and they will grow up and be in charge of the world. Maybe it is my business- maybe it is all of our business.
Heaven knows there are lots of ways to screw up our kids. And certainly I am guilty of more than I would like to admit. (Let's just say one relative has commented on our having no rules in our house). But isn't putting your little one in the care of someone else for the majority of time that they are awake- a huge blunder? 
I don't have the answers- and I sure don't want to go back to a pre Betty Friedan mindset, but this is important stuff. "What matters most in our children's lives?"

Who Needs Starbucks?

Let me explain... I was having a cup of delicious coffee this morning and I thought: I have to share my find. I have a recipe for "cannoli cream" from Giada de Laurentiis cookbook. To be honest it is the only recipe I use with frequency from this cookbook. It to makes fruit extra appealing to my three year old. And now I have found it's deliciousness in coffee. The recipe is as follows:
1/3 cup ricotta cheese (I actually use whipped cream cheese)
2 tbsp and 1/3 cup whipping cream
3 tbsp powdered sugar
pinch of cinnamon
(and I add a dash of almond extract)


Stir cream cheese and 2 tbsp cream to blend in a good size bowl. Then add the rest of the whipping cream, powdered sugar, cinnamon and extract. Whip with a mixer until semi firm peaks form.


The picture above is actually from a different recipe. (There wasn't one for the cannoli cream). The result is more of a fluffy whipped topping rather than a pudding). And it looks gorgeous melting atop a warm cup of coffee. Starbucks can't do it justice. 
Give it a try. I suggest making the topping for fresh fruit and making extra, put it in tupperware and spoon it into your coffee for the next few mornings!

Insidiousness

Look at this horrible, scary book cover. Hard to believe this is the go to book I use when I need a little child rearing advice. You may be wondering: just how horrible is this little girl I've been hearing about? Actually the book is not as it appears from the cover. It's good common sense.

Here's what been happening in our house (perhaps you can relate). I've been going about my daily life together with my three year old and she amps up her demands just a little bit each day. It's like a frog in a pot of water that gets slowly hotter and never notices it's going to boil. Well all of a sudden last week- the demands were too much. (Tipping point). One little child shouldn't rob a mother of that much energy. So out come the rules, the boundaries and the tears (from both of us). And out comes this handy book from my shelf of regulars.

Although we are currently in a testing over breakfast this morning, this week is going much better than last. And while L is doing anything other than eating her breakfast. It allows me to get some reading done and to write this post. Quietly (without anger), I am holding firm- no fun until 5 pieces of waffle are eaten.

Hope your Monday is off to a good start.

Summer Pondering

Well it looks like my posts are getting few and far between. I suppose the next two months will be like this with less time for pondering and drawing.

Do you like the title of the above book? I suppose I am always looking for a manual to learn  how to live right so I end up with no regrets. I am starting to learn that you have to figure it out day by day, week by week etc. And even if there was a manual- it would be pretty boring just to follow along a pre- configured path. 

I did like what Montagne had to say on many subjects. Here are some of his ideas about reading. Don't make an effort with reading or writing. "If I encounter difficulties in reading, I do not gnaw my nails over them: I leave them there. I do nothing without gaiety." He abandoned whatever bored him. He believed everything should be approached in "gentleness and freedom, without rigor and constraint." I myself am newly converted to this idea. I used to think I had to improve myself (and that involved some struggle). Now I'm starting to think life should come more naturally and we are little vessels here to soak up the sights, sounds and wonders while we are here.

Anyone have any thoughts to this mysterious adventure we are on and "how to live".

Happy July

Our first crop and the proud estate owner (the boss pictured above). 

It has been a fairly chili and rainy June here in upstate NY. Our basil and tomatoes are having trouble, but the lettuce is thriving.
Matt has done a beautiful job making raised beds and creating order out of our garden plot. (I will take pictures once we have a sunny day to showcase it).  Usually we are expert at growing weeds, but we have high hopes of making a lovely, productive little garden. 

Make things to know yourself

Here's a new little sketch from my sketchbook. I won't bore you with much to say about it because I don't know what to say. 


In Austin Kleon's great post about "How to Steal like an Artist", he says you don't have to know who you are before you create something. He says make things to know yourself. So I'm hoping some larger picture forms from all the disparate pieces.


Hope everyone is having a good Monday. We are on the mend here from last weeks rain and fevers.

Fancy Dad

Here is another drawing of my dad. I did this one and the one from Monday's post probably about 7 years ago. I made up some fancy clothes for him to give him a aristocratic look, just for fun. 

Anyhow, the creativity isn't flowing this week. We have a girl with a summer virus and seem to be surrounded by cranky calls and bosses (for Matt). So we are all a bit on edge this week. "Tangled" is starting for the 4th time in 2 days and the rain is still coming down... wish us luck and sunlight.

Visit with the Parents

Back from visiting my parents. There is my dad (his teeth don't really look like that it was a joke we had with chicklets). It seems like the visits are few and far between and are much too short. It is so strange, isn't it, how intertwined your lives are when you are growing up and then the relationship changes. I look at them so differently too. Once they were such a source of stability, like towers of reliability - sometimes frustrating in butting up against them, but ultimately a beacon. I still don't doubt their integrity, but they are more complicated and more eccentric than I realized. As they age I either notice it more or their personalities have gotten more extreme. 

In addition to this all being a little emotionally unsettling, the humbling part is remembering my parents having these conversations about their parents when we would visit 30 years ago. What's on the horizon in for me? (How about for you?). What traits of ours are going to get extreme?

The End of an Error

Today was L's last day of preschool (and my last glimpse of a little freedom). No camps, no classes and no scheduled activities on the horizon. My gut tells me this is what is best for my little, independent almost four year old. I can only speak for us (and if we have learned anything from our preschool experience it is that our little girl is supposedly different from all others), but all she wants out of summer is to run, swing, climb, go to the lake and have little to no schedule.

Now, lately I've been getting iphone pics and facebook messages from mothers showing their near four year olds at the piano in recitals. Are the pictures cute? Yes, all dressed up and looking like little adults... full of potential. But somebody fill me in on why little ones are doing piano recitals and the like. Again, I know I have a particularly independent minded kid, but I don't get it. Why so much driving, classes, schedules... Can we not just hang out, be with each other and have ice cream? What race are we in? And where's the finish line? I suppose we are doomed to come in last place. But I have a secret: off the radar is just where I like to be.

Now for the pandowdy report.

Again I made a double batch. And in both test homes the pandowdy was a hit with the adults and a miss with the kids. So if you want to please your under 6 crowd, go with the buckle. If you want to enjoy a dessert and not have to fight with the kids for your piece, go with the pandowdy. Therefor, perhaps the perfect recipe for daddy on Father's Day.

Have a good one!

Art and Cooking

Here is my little respect to Gertrude Jekyll- landscape designer of the Arts and Crafts period. I have been researching more and more on garden design of this period. Unfortunately, I haven't had much time to sketch. This week I am going to try to do more sketching than reading. But I find I must dip into philosophical texts- such as Echart Tolle's Power of Now, etc. when I do art work. For some reason (probably from too much art school) my mind drives me crazy every time I pick up a paint brush. So- primary purpose, enjoy the process and don't think, be... I know it sounds crazy. 

OK, I had such success with the buckle- this week I am baking a pandowdy. Its in the oven right now. I will take some pics and tell you the result.

Got to go...

Log book

I've started to keep a visual daily record. I stole the idea from a great post I read by Austin Kleon called "How to Steal like an Artist". (So I'm sure he would approve of my stealing). Now this is just the kind of thing I start in excitement and don't follow through. I've only been doing it for 8 or 9 days, but looking back through it, I can see I've already forgotten all these little things that we do in a day and I am tickled reading it. I will try to keep up.


The quick ink sketches about daily activities remind me a bit of one of my favorite artists: mummysam. Check out her drawings on etsy or flickr. Here is a link: (I sincerely hope I am not stepping on her toes by doing this- I know her in person and she is as lovely as her drawings).
http://www.flickr.com/photos/34366735@N06/4276158599/in/photostream/


I hope my drawings can look as good with some practice.


Here is what Austin Kleon says:
Be boring. Its the only way to get work done. Get yourself a calendar and log book, break down tasks into bits of time (make it a game). And for past events, I suggest a log book. You'd be amazed at how helpful having a daily record can be.

I'm so happy to report that the buckle was a success! I brought one (I made a double batch) to my bestest friends' house and to my delight the entire dessert was eaten in short order by her three kids- age 2,4 and 5 (my own 3 year old was a bit more ungrateful). Not only did the buckle go down quickly- but the older kids had fun with saying the name "buckle". Which got me thinking where does the term come from? My research says- a buckle is a single layer cake with berries added to the batter. The topping is similar to a streusel which gives it a buckled appearance. Surprisingly the use of the word buckle for pastry is fairly recent- dating only to the 1950's.


 While googling I came across other great berry cake names- "the betty", "grunt", "pandowdy", "slump", and (of course) "cobbler". Making the thought of being a food historian sound pretty interesting.


Anyone interested in the recipe? It came from this magazine- which is quite good. Here's the recipe:


1 1/2 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup applesauce
1/2 canola oil (or whatever kind)
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1 1/2 cup blueberries
1 1/2 cup halved pitted cherries (but I used strawberries instead)
2 tbsp. slice almonds
2 tsp. sugar for topping (raw cane sugar if you have it)


Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Coat a 9- inch baking dish with spray.


Whisk flour, baking powder, cinnamon and salt together in a large bowl. Whisk milk, applesauce, oil, sugar, egg, and vanilla together in a medium bowl. Add the wet ingredients into the dry and fold until blended. Add berries and fold. Spoon into baking dish. Top with sliced almonds and sprinkle with sugar.


Bake until golden brown and do the toothpick test. Should take about 45-55 minutes. Let cool for 30 minutes before serving.


Lastly, enjoy, make a double batch and bring some to your bestest friend!

Summertime and the living is easy

Now it really feels like summer is here. Yesterday began with the championship match of the French Open. Nadal v. Federer. (The best rivalry ever). And then strawberries at the farmers market. At least a third of the quart was eaten before we ever left the market, but with the remainder and some blueberries, I think I will make a "buckle". (I don't believe I've made a buckle before, but the picture above had me sold- I will substituted the strawberries for the cherries).  

What ushers in summer for you?

Summer Uniform

Why does this boring closet of mine give me so much pleasure? This weekend I culled the last of the ugly and bad fitting clothes and then I folded and tidied what was left. I have found I have a summer uniform of mostly black and white tops and a small variety of jeans, pants and a few simple skirts. Everything matches and mostly looks good on me!
I came across a quote yesterday that explained to me why I love my simple little closet:


"Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work."- Flaubert.


OK- step one done. Now expect some violent and original posts in the future! 

Mystery Lovers Unite

Anyone interested in the book I mentioned? I forgot to tell you the author's name: Alan Bradley.

This one is the second in the series.

I will perhaps wet your appetite a little more with the last few lines of the book. (Don't worry, it doesn't give anything away). The narrator is 11 year old Flavia de Luce. She writes: "I paused at the door...and turned. 'If anyone wants me,' I said 'I shall be upstairs, weeping at the bottom of my closet.'"

Now normally I can't stand precocious kids- but Flavia is different. She is neglected (in a large country estate in 1950's England) enough to not have the annoying puffed up sense of self most brilliant kids have. She also has a good sense of humor. I think you will like her too.

Through Time and Space (Again)

Armchair traveling through time and space again. These are from the italian gardens of Isola Bella. I am currently meandering through books from the library: Edith Wharton's Italian Villas and Gardens, the Edwardian House Style Book, the Lost Garden of Gertrude Jekyll, and Maxfield Parrish Paintings. It's a feast for the eyes. I'm also trying to work some things out in my painting and drawing style. What to leave in and what to leave out? Where is detail important and where is simplicity important? How whimsical do I want to be? 

I have a tendency to labor over drawings, and I want to learn to be quicker with confidence. We will see how it goes. With time in short supply- I can't linger over drawings. 

Also I am traveling through time and space in my fiction reading. I have come across these great mysteries. If you have a penchant for well written mysteries like I do... I love this "Flavia de Luce" mystery series. It takes place in a small town in 1950's England. The main character is 11 year old Flavia de Luce with her brilliant knowledge of chemistry and interest in poisons. Check it out.

The Grand Tour

Do expressions like: "Edwardian Era, Grand Tour, Italian Villas, Parterres, Grottos..." curl your toes the way they do mine?


Well I have started some armchair traveling lately through time and space. My first excursion involves following Edith Wharton's grand tour of Italian villas in the early 1900's. She started by traveling through Switzerland into the Lombardy Region of Italy via the Simpton Pass. Consider this description:


"One by one the travelers alighted from their carriages and fell under the spell cast by the purity of transalpine light playing on the splendor of the scenery. It was a landscape that stretched from the highest highs of its perpetually snowy white peaks to the bottomless depths of its brooding, deep blue lakes."

Doesn't a Grand Tour of the Italian villas and gardens of the Lombardy Region sound like a great place to start our journey? Let's armchair travel together and see where we end up.

An afternoon at the movies

So, I was able to escape for a little while Saturday afternoon and I went to see this movie. (picture above).  It is a documentary about the life of New York Times style page journalist- Bill Cunningham. If this sounds vaguely like your cup of tea, I highly recommend putting it on your netflix queue. More than his work- I was (am) fascinated by this man. Integrity and passion for his work says it all. (But actually there is so much more...)


Now as all things relate back to me, I found this movie to be particularly good timing. I have recently gotten a bit of renewed energy for some drawing ideas. But at the age of 41, I am also a little weary when these waves of enthusiasm come over me, because I have a way of inexplicably ruining my fun. Somehow the result becomes more important than the fun of looking and creating. That is where Bill Cunningham comes in. My guru. Seemingly, no ego gets in the way of his good time. 


Go see the movie- or put it on your queue and we can talk.
In the meantime- I will work on my ideas and share. Wish me luck in not spoiling my fun.
Have a good Monday everyone.

Object of Beauty

A new development has taken place since our 10 day trip to the mid west. My three year old daughter has taken to sleeping with mommy and or daddy. So nap time has been a challenge. (And nap time is sacred to me- much needed quiet time for mommy). So lately, instead of disrupting the nap- I've taken to bringing up ample reading supplies and spending an hour and half or so in the little twin bed while L sleeps. To be honest- I've taken to loving this time too. I glance over at my heavy- breathing, hot little sleeping girl and feel pure love (so often complicated when she is awake and pouring noodles into her lemonade at dinner time, for example).


My current nap time read is Steve Martin's Object of Beauty. And while it is a good book, I am finding I am becoming more interested in Steve Martin than the protagonist. I am fascinated that a man who is celebrated for his acting and comedy- has such an extensive understanding of art and the art world. He has honed his writing craft and plays the banjo. I think I will read his autobiography next. I am interested in why and how someone so successful in one industry has the courage to immerse himself in other things. Maybe courage isn't the right word- but I get the feeling that he has real interests in art, music, writing and that these interests rather than advancing his career are the driving forces behind his activities. I like that.


I'll let you know what I find out.

How do I look?

My daughter has the best wardrobe (thanks mostly to my mom). I am covetous. So I did a little mock up of what I would look like in my daughters beautiful striped coat. She only wears a few of her many gorgeous things. I may have to "dress" myself in more of her clothes.


On another note, consider this quote:


"Mediocrity, I discovered, was the great camouflage; the great protective coloring. Those boys who didn't fail yet did not excel, were left alone, free of the demands of the master who might wish to groom them for glory and of the school bully who might make them his scapegoat. That simple fact was the first great discovery of my life."


What do you think? It goes against the american way- does it not? We are suppose to stand out. But to stand out you have to have an audience. What about the freedom to do as you please- unnoticed. Which is more important to you?

Five Year Gestation?

Warning: This post is going to sound corny and self serving!


Recently, I was thinking about how little time there is to do all the writing, reading, blogging, etc. that I love to do. L's napping in unpredictable, we are going to school less days (see previous posts) and summer is coming... I remembered how a friend told me (and she was told by her mom) that it takes until your youngest born is in kindergarten before you get your "you" life back- but then you do. Some days five years seems like an eternity. But what was my free time like before my daughter was born? I occasionally get a glimpse by looking back at my journals. There is a self importance, a lack of perspective and yes a neuroticism I don't wish to repeat. So maybe these 5 years will change me (no doubt I am still neurotic and self absorbed, but hopefully a little less). What do you moms think? Is this a time of rebirth? When you get a bit you your life back are you changed for the better? Or just more grey hairs and worry lines? I still have a year and a half to go. Time to be on hold: to play bubbles, laugh and cry with my daughter and look into her eyes for as long as she lets me. Maybe I can slow time down even more.

Lilies of the Valley

Happy Spring everyone. Today's post is about May Day (which would have been more appropriate to have written 10 days ago- but I am behind with most things). So in France May Day is celebrated with Lilies of the Valley. They are called "le muguet" there. In the 16th century wreaths of le muguet were hung on the doors of brides-to-be in May. May Day is the labor holiday in France and workers wear boutonniers of these lovely little flowers on this day. And lastly, the blooming of these spring flowers signifies the "official" return to happiness. 
So that's something to celebrate.

This and That

Good morning. Today is a hodgepodge of loose ends. First, I recommend again the book: "Happiness Project" and the blog by the same title. At the moment, I am resolving to not have resolutions- and the book is heavy with resolutions. I am finding that it is more important to have space in the day than a long list of things to do (even if those things are happiness related). But that said there was a lot to take from the book. The author quotes Robert Louis Stevenson, "there isn't a duty we so underrate as the duty of being happy". It is a service to other people- and not just a selfish pursuit. And it reminds me to appreciate those around me who do "light" and make it seem effortless. 


On Gretchen Rubin's Happiness Project blog there was a link to another excellent blog posting. It was called "How to Steal Like an Artist" by Austin Kleon. Check it out if you get a chance. My favorite parts were: when asked where he gets his ideas, he says he steals them. Nothing is original: everything new is just a mash up or remix of previous ideas. And he says he says he sees the role of artist as collector. But the trick is to collect selectively. 
There are many more nuggets of wisdom in this post- I plan to go back and revisit after I digest these.


And lastly- an update on my vegan project (see earlier posts). This week for meals I am hitting some recipes that were particularly good: Spinach Noodle Kugel and Bean Burgers. I am finding most of the recipes to be quite good- and these two are pretty quick to make.
Give them a try.

 Can you read these. Let me know if I need to print bigger.

Queen E

Is it too late to post about the royal wedding? We all are probably over it. 
I did this drawing on the day of the wedding. I thought it would be fun to draw the queen's face and that hat!


Next, I may do a nod to Harry. He looked quite handsome. I liked all the medals, etc. on his costume. Who else thinks he is the spitting image of James Hewitt? DNA test anyone?

Lessons from my trip to the Mid West

     Hi everyone. I am back from our spring break trip to the Mid West to visit my in-laws. Before I left, I told a good friend about this trip and my trepidation of the long car ride and possible nuttiness from the in-laws. In her words of wisdom she said- she uses her nutty parents and in- laws to teach her how to be a good grandmother and mother-in-law in her future. How wise. And while I can't complain, Matt's parents were on their best behavior- my friends words were ringing in my ears. 
     I also was reading this book, "the Happiness Project" and some ideas overlapped. How to be a good parent, grandparent, in-law etc...? Practice happiness or some form of optimism and openness. A good point that the author makes is that we under value our happiness- not just in the good feelings it brings to us, but how it lifts others around us. 
"One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make other people happy; one of the best ways to make other people happy is to be happy yourself." 
Lots of people wear their unhappiness as a badge of honor. As the author also says: "It's easy to be heavy. It's hard to be light."
Of course, it is hard to be light and good spirited when your body hurts. (And my in- laws are suffering from physical pain). Which brings me to my second lesson. Work to keep your body healthy! I love the book "Younger Next Year" as my aging bible. As soon as L is in school regularly, I plan to keep this promise. 


On another note. The royal wedding is only a day away. Is anyone planning to get up early- as many of us did for Charles and Diane? Or is TiVo going to do the work this time around? Enjoy. Can't wait to see the spectacle.

See You Soon

Just a quick note. Next week is Spring Break and we will be elbow deep in grandparents for the next 10 days. I probably won't get much time for pondering and blogging. 
Hope you all have a lovely April. I must say, I have been having the best time talking to people (on play dates or at chance meetings at the coffee shop) who have read a post from my little blog and have much to say about it. That is delightful! I don't think I have the biggest audience- but I think I have the loveliest.

Fulfillment or Achievement???

Are we an achievement oriented society? Lately I've been pondering the difference between fulfillment and achievement. Here are some thoughts... A dictionary definitions for fulfillment is: "the contentment one feels when one has fulfilled a desire, need or expectation." A definition for achievement is: "A thing done successfully, typically by effort, courage or skill... Achievement requires drive and, in many cases, single mindedness".


So pondering this, I think the main difference is the struggle involved in achievement and perhaps something (ie. your resume, diploma...) to show for achievement. Fulfillment seems to be more at our fingertips. Yes you have to complete something- but it can be personal, resonate with your ideals and be utterly pleasing. Here's the question then, does the lack of struggle and the lack of measurable outcomes make fulfillment less important than achievement? Inquiring minds want to know. What are your thoughts?


In the interest of full disclosure- I have to admit I have never been very good at achieving (although occasionally I try) and I am envious of others who are more driven and successful than myself. I am siding with fulfillment, but perhaps it is sour grapes. 

The British Diversion

I'm finding that the British are providing a nice diversion lately. First, my dear friend and blog follower is creating a British lingo day with her kids to spice things up. They will speak with British accents for the day. My little sketch to the left and post for the day is a nice light change from all the pontificating I've been doing here lately. And the royal wedding of course is a lovely diversion. I've been enjoying some London bloggers lately with photos of all the William and Kate knick knacks they've come across in shops.
Thank you royals. Now does everyone of a certain age remember where they were when Charles and Diane wed? I do.

Much Ado...

Here is a book I highly recommend. Actually most of the information is just common sense, but I have found it to be the perfect antidote to all the stress and concern I have had lately due to our preschool situation. The book in a nutshell talks about all the pressure parents feel to give their child a leg up and mold them into idealized little people. In reality, play and unscheduled, free time is best for the child on every level, particularly if you value creative thinking over rote learning. There is a lot more to the book and its worth a look- I am putting it on my shelf of favorites (there is a topic for another post: our favorite books shelf).
But this common sense parenting is making me think of another area we parents get pressured on: is your child growing up quickly enough? I am thinking of how my daughter's teachers are impatient with her not following multi stepped directions. (She is only three). Also, we are gearing up for a visit to my husband's family in a few weeks and both of us expect a little disapproval that our daughter is still using a pacifier at night and is not able to sit for a full meal. And the last thing that stands out in my mind on this topic is when our daughter was about 9 months old and we were visiting cousins. The wife of a cousin told us to spend more time making our daughter "walk" (and she was very proud that her daughter learned to walk at an early age). So what is the reason for wanting our kids to grow up ASAP? My daughter learned to walk at her own pace- just as she will be able to sit for a meal soon enough and the pacifier I'm sure won't go to college with her.
All of this is to say: enough already on the parenting advice. (Right?! Everyone has on opinion). Kids will learn and grow up at their own pace. We must use common sense and not feel pressure to rush children or have idealized expectations. 
Ahhhh, Relax... Maybe this can actually be fun.

One Last Thing...

To the left here is a picture of Maria Montessori and I notice they have a picture of her in my daughter's pre school classroom. It reminded me of when you take yoga classes and they have a picture of some guru hanging up. Which brings me to todays topic: Montessori as religion. Is any one or everyone tired of the subject of my daughter's school? If so, sorry. I think this will be my last rant. 


I was yet again pondering the question of why L's teachers were so adamant about her having developmental problems even after the results of the evaluation and a committee meeting said otherwise. In our discussions with them we kept saying their classroom appears to work very well for many children, but just isn't a good fit with our daughter's temperament. 


Then it occurred to me why they couldn't accept this. They believe in the tenants of the Montessori principles and have the vigor toward early intervention for special needs the way many people approach their religious beliefs. They practice their teaching with such zeal that there isn't room for other interpretations. This comparison made sense to me- I didn't doubt that these were kind hearted people and also now I understand that their position will not change. In their eyes our daughter will have "problems" and they won't change their behavior toward her.


I hope this (perhaps harsh critique of Montessori principles and religion) strikes the reader as either true or false and that you feel free to explain to me why. 

Three Year Old Perfection (to her mom and dad anyway)

Self Portrait (from L's photo portfolio)

So yesterday was the end of our evaluation experience. Punctuated by a committee hearing on L's eligibility for special needs help or disability services. Although the results of her evaluation are that she is in the normal range for her developmental progress, and we feel comfortable that what we see at home and on play dates is just fine and no red flags, her teachers are still certain there is something wrong. We believe their hearts are in the right place, but they are wrong. They are so certain that their school is "flawless" (my word not theirs) that they can't believe that it may not be a good fit for my daughter. Therefor the issue is our daughter and not the environment to them. 

So with their words ringing in our ears at the end of the conference committee: "we are certain you will be back to the office of special needs in a year and you will have missed valuable time", we are over analyzing every little quirky thing L does. Along those line, here is kind of a funny little story.

I was driving my daughter to school a couple of weeks ago and (somewhat inanely) engaging her in conversation using techniques that her evaluator had given me. Oh and  let me add that many mornings before this whole evaluation experience- I would have the radio on and we would have a relaxing, fairly quiet ride to school. Well after about 5 minutes of my prattling on, L says to me: "Turn the radio on please, Mommy" (she's nothing if not polite). And when I did, she visible relaxed in her car seat and looked out the window in relief. 

So much for all this expertise????